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Men’s fellowship begins new battle
archived from: 2007-11-12
by: William Cone

Since its formation in 2005, Catholic Men’s Fellowship of Pittsburgh has been a forum for men to gather to study and pray the Scriptures and connect with the realities involving their responsibilities to family, children and career amid today’s cultural battlefield.

At an event Nov. 3 at St. Paul Seminary, CMF opened a new battle front — the battle for integrity — to promote sexual purity and help men struggling against the sin of pornography.

A Catholic man told the story of his personal fight with porn to about 300 men at the seminary in Crafton.

“Today we officially kick off the Battle for Integrity,” he said, mentioning mailings that have gone out and material that has been added to the CMF Web site (www.cmfpitt.org).

“Unofficially, we’ve been fighting this battle for some time. Each one of us fights it every day,” the speaker said.

He said 85 percent of men admit to some type of sexual sin. “One priest told me the other 15 percent are just lying.”

The fight is not just with pornography, he said. It’s also against letting your eyes linger too long when looking at a pretty girl, or spending too much time flirting with an attractive co-worker, or going to a strip club with the guys.

The man’s own battle with pornography began when he was about 12 years old. From magazines, he went to videotapes, then to the Internet. Those experiences shaped his consciousness and relationships, with an ongoing desire for sexual gratification.

When he became an adult and needed to travel as part of his job, he said the Internet presented a new challenge.

“When you’re sitting in a hotel room and you have a laptop and you have high-speed Internet, what do you do? So I started looking at pornography on the road when I was traveling for work,” he said.

The presenter credits the love and understanding of his wife, the firm spiritual guidance of priests, the sacrament of penance and timely help from friends for helping him deal with his problem and stay sexually pure.

“I forfeited my free will for the majority of my life,” he said. “I acted as though I was powerless. I am not powerless. We are not powerless.”

One of the leaders of the new CMF effort, Bill Talerico of St. Louise de Marillac Parish in Upper St. Clair, explained that the program actually has three “fronts”: the battle for personal integrity, the battle for marriage and the battle for our children.

CMF also will facilitate the forming of accountability partners (someone men can communicate with openly and honestly about sexual sins) and offer ongoing educational content to learn more about God and what he wants for his people.

The battle for marriage will emphasize the sanctity of marriage and help husbands better live out their call to be Christ to their spouse.

The battle for children will concentrate on helping Catholic men be the best fathers and save their children from today’s sex-obsessed culture.

Talerico said he has talked with many people about addiction to pornography, and many don’t feel it’s right to call it an addiction.

“They talk about pornography and they really distance themselves from it being an addiction. They say, ‘It’s not that bad, just something I do. I just use it a little.’ And I equate that to saying, ‘I only use heroin once a week.’ ‘I only look at Internet pornography every so often.’ It’s like shooting up. A little bit of us dies every time we do it.”

Father James Wehner, diocesan director of evangelization and CMF laiason, spoke about what is meant by sexual purity. He said the virtues that must be cultivated to combat sexual sins include prudence, justice, fortitude and temperance.

Leading a eucharistic prayer service, Father Wehner urged the men to be steadfast, take up their cross and be Christ to those they encounter.

The CMF Web site contains resources “to strengthen, equip, support and educate men to transform their lives, turn from sexual temptation and fight for integrity and chastity, all to the glory of God.” Talerico’s e-mail address (bill@cmfpitt.org) is provided for those seeking information or confidential support.

  Catholic Men’s Fellowship of Pittsburgh and the CMF group at St. Francis of Assisi Parish in Finleyville, Washington County, will host a roundtable discussion Saturday, Nov. 24, for the men of nearby parishes. The event will begin with Mass at 8:30 a.m. at St. Francis, celebrated by Father Robert Boyle, pastor.

Facilitator of the discussion will be Henry Lassige. Information will be provided about CMF and how to start a parish group. All men of Allegheny, Washington and Greene counties are welcome. For more information, contact Father Boyle at 724-348-7145.

CMF is for men who desire to live out their daily lives inspired by like-minded men who wish to deepen their relationship with Jesus Christ. Together, they study the Scriptures and “Catechism of the Catholic Church” to become better husbands, fathers and men.

 

 

 

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