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Starting parish men’s group? Here’s some advice
archived from: 2006-08-17
by: Chuck Moody

Perhaps you attended the daylong diocesan-wide gathering April 1 at the A.J. Palumbo Center at Duquesne University or another event sponsored by the Catholic Men’s Fellowship of Pittsburgh.

Maybe you have been inspired enough that you want to start a men’s fellowship group at your own parish, which does not have such an organization, but you’re unsure how to go about it.

The first step is to contact your pastor and make sure he is comfortable with, and supportive of, a men’s group at the parish, said Jeff Ludwikowski, co-executive director of the Catholic Men’s Fellowship of Pittsburgh.

“Once he approves, most groups have found that starting with a core group of three to eight men, who have voiced their willingness to deepen their faith by joining a men’s group, results in the best chances to form a long-lasting ministry,” Ludwikowski said. “These men can be identified by the men who have volunteered to facilitate the group, the pastor or a combination of both. Personal invitations to these men, either by a face-to-face contact, or a written invitation from the pastor if he is willing, are most effective.”

Prior to the first meeting, the facilitators need either to attend a workshop and obtain the appropriate training and materials to ensure that the group stays on track, or meet individually with a men’s fellowship member and attend an existing men’s group at a nearby parish, he said.

“Once the group starts to meet, the men are encouraged to invite other men they know who might be interested in and benefit from participating in a men’s group,” Ludwikowski said. “Hopefully, the group will continue to grow and spin off other groups in the parish.”

Catholic Men’s Fellowship plans to hold workshops at least twice a year at St. Paul Seminary in Crafton to help men and parishes form groups. The first workshop was held May 6.

“We will meet for about two hours to help interested men learn how to facilitate a men’s group,” Ludwikowski said about the workshops. “At the workshop, we will go over the typical meeting format, which consists of initially sharing some fellowship over a cup of coffee and maybe some doughnuts, an opening song or two, opening prayer and intercessions, Scripture reading, readings from the relevant catechism paragraphs, discussion, closing prayer and a closing song. We will talk about how often and how long each group meeting should be, give suggestions on these items and emphasize the need to stay on schedule.”

Each session is geared toward a particular theme for that day, usually taken from one of the approved resources that Catholic Men’s Fellowship recommends, he said.

“We will recommend several resources to use to guide the groups, starting with ‘Signposts,’ spend some time talking about techniques to facilitate discussion, emphasize that all materials must be approved by the church, and give some alternative plans to be used on occasion, such as attending Mass together, attending a holy hour together, occasionally inviting a guest speaker to attend, especially if a topic covered in a previous session was unclear, planning programs around families and organizing a prayer chain, for example,” Ludwikowski said.

“We hope to then conduct a panel discussion of men from existing groups, focusing on what they enjoy, what works well in their groups, and what doesn’t work.”

Some people apparently have referred to Catholic Men’s Fellowship as a “movement,” but Pat Molyneaux, co-executive director of the Pittsburgh group, views it as a “resource.”

“A ‘movement’ implies something that’s distinct from parish life, or creating something entirely new or different,” Molyneaux said. “A ‘resource’ is something to help people accomplish what they know they need to do anyway. We’re not breaking any new ground here or creating something that would exist outside the parishes. Our goal is to get men together within their parishes to help themselves grow spiritually and enrich their faith.”

Support from the pastor is crucial to the successful formation and continuation of a men’s group within a parish, Ludwikowski said.

“The pastor can help identify men who can serve as part of the core group to start the effort,” he said. “Additionally, many pastors have recommended that individual men, who they know, attend the men’s group meeting to see if it is something they might enjoy. A brief statement from the pulpit, making the congregation aware of the group, voicing his support, and encouraging men to give it a try goes a long way toward helping keep the group going. Many pastors also occasionally attend the group meetings and suggest special events for the group, such as attending a Mass together.”

Many Catholics offer time, talent and treasure in service to the local parish, said Molyneaux, who personally offers his service to the diocesan Office for Evangelization under the direction of Father James Wehner. “I think of myself as a volunteer at the disposal of our Office for Evangelization,” Molyneaux said. “Father Jim has mobilized the time, talent and treasure of myself, Jeff and the other leaders. I am in touch with him, seeking his insights and wisdom, a few times each week.

“One of my important jobs is to make sure the time he offers this men’s ministry is highly leveraged by allowing him to effectively mobilize the time, talent and treasure myself and the other leaders offer. We have hundreds of hours and several thousand dollars — money we raised on our own — invested in this ministry.”

CMF is one practical, tangible expression of the church’s call for a new evangelization in which the lay faithful become more active and involved in society, “bringing their faith to the secular, temporal order,” Father Wehner said.

“The CMF is an apostolate in which men gather at the parish or regional level to study and pray the sacred Scriptures, using an ecclesiastically approved resource,” he said. “The purpose of the study and prayer is to then connect the men with the realities involving their responsibility to family, children, career and society.

“The reason I feel this apostolate ought to be invited into every parish is because Catholic men today often struggle to find other men who have the same interest in sharing faith, who want to do more with that faith and ultimately defend the faith.”

One of the theological characteristics of evangelization is “interculturation,” Father Wehner said.

“Interculturation is when the culture of faith dialogues with the culture of humanity — a dialogue which results in the formation of a just, virtuous society,” he said. “This dialogue is critical because it is in the arena of society that faith is lived. Without society, faith would be reduced to superstition or become a remote experience disconnected from reality. Likewise, a culture without faith would be reduced to chaos and hedonism. “The CMF, in its service to the church, encourages Catholic men to interculturate faith and society — a witness greatly needed in our country today.” The Pittsburgh group is unique compared to other models around the country, Molyneaux said.

“For example, in Detroit they handle it in the Office for Evangelization,” he said. “They had to add diocesan staff to plan and execute the conference, and I suspect the expenses far outstrip the conference income. Cincinnati is the other extreme. They have the archbishop’s approval, but they are not in close collaboration with their diocesan Office for Evangelization. The only clergy on their board is an order priest.”

CMF of Pittsburgh has only been in existence for about a year, and already some two dozen parishes have started men’s groups and several more have voiced an interest in doing so, Ludwikowski said.

“In Cincinnati, where the first CMF was started, it took almost 10 years for the ministry to move to the point where it was able to host an annual diocesan-wide gathering of men,” he said. “The Pittsburgh CMF has been abundantly blessed by the Holy Spirit, hosting its first gathering of Catholic men barely one year after its inception. We pray that the fruits of this ministry parallel those of Cincinnati’s efforts, where now over 200 men’s groups are meeting regularly and over 5,000 men attend the annual gathering.

“We have proven that we have a better football team. Now, we have the opportunity to show that we also have as strong a group of devout Catholic men rising up to support their church.”

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